Humor - How do these people survive?

ONE
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you
could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half
dozen nuggets. "We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the
counter. "You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was
the reply. "So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?"
"That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets

TWO
I was checking out at the local Walmart with just a few items
and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up
one of those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it
between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned
all of my items, she picked up the "divider," looking it all over for the
bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me, "Do
you know how much this is?" I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't
think I'll buy that today." She said "OK," and I paid her for the things
and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.

THREE
A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her
floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she
was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking
for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."

FOUR
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do
you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced
the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do
you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a
battery to fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked.
"No, just this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to
me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't
you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk."

FIVE
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One
day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of
typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the secretary
told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of
paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

SIX
I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home was
towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair
and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister." I asked
the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the
"cruise control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.

SEVEN
My neighbor works in the operations department in the central
office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have
problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one
of the branch banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming from the
back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"


EIGHT
Police in Radnor, Pa., interrogated a suspect by placing a metal
colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine.
The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the
copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth.
Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.

NINE
A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs
to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid was eating ants. The
dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and should be fine, the
mother says, I just gave him some ant killer..... Dispatcher: Rush him in
to emergency!

Life is tough. It's tougher if you're stupid."

The Latest, The Greatest

Last night we went out to the driving range and hit a bucket o' balls and then played 18 holes of minature golf. It was a beautiful night out, warm yet comfortable. Would ya believe I'm starting to hit the ball straight! I'm not totally consistant, but what the heck, I'm having fun!
Who is the guy playing bass in the photo below? More to come!

Mini Golf - Computer Style

Fun For The Whole Family!

Bubble Girl

Bubble Girl

This is interesting! Kinda like a Lava Lamp!

Birthday Calculator

Birthday Calculator

This site gives you interesting details about your birthday. It even shows you what the moon looked like on the night you were born.

Humor - Cowboy Chili

Take a deep breath before you start-------------

This young cowboy walks into a seedy cafe in a small town in West Texas.

He sits at the counter and notices an older cowboy with his arms folded staring blankly at a bowl of chili.

After about 15 minutes of just sitting there staring at it, the young cowboy bravely asks, "if you ain't goin to eat that, mind if I do"?

The older cowboy slowly turns his head toward the young wrangler and in his best cowboy manner states "Nah, go ahead". Eagerly, the young cowboy reaches over and slides the bowl over to his place and starts spooning it in with delight.

He gets nearly down to the bottom and notices a rotten dead rat in the chili. The sight was shocking and he immediately pukes up the chili into the bowl.

The old cowboy quietly says, "Yep, that's as far as> I got, too"

U_thrill_me

U_thrill_me - Page: 1 of 1

George Barris and Butch Patrick

Last night, Class Car Night in Downtown Crystal Lake had the privilage of having George Barris and Butch Patrick stop by and say hello. They are appearing at the Volo Auto Museum on July 3rd. Both of these guys are class acts and it was a pleasure to meet them.

Here I am with George Barris, King of the Customs. George is a true genius with cars!


Here I am with the legendary star of stage and screen - Butch Patrick! What a great guy!

Here I am with George, Butch and a woman from the Volo Auto Museum! If you get the chance, go see George and Butch there on July 3rd, 2005. You will be glad you went!